CU Boulder, the "Ivy League" Public School

I covered my friend's classes today while he was at a conference. I just got done with the last one and I have to say that all hope for the future of this planet is lost.

First of all, there is no other way to say it. They're stupid. They cannot think. They do not wish to be able to. Their vocabulary is limited to that which T9 recognizes.

But beyond that, they're the rudest, most disrespectful, and "entitled" little bastards I've ever encountered. Pitts got nothing on these bitches.

A student, in this class today, picked up a newspaper and started reading it while I was talking to him. I swear to god. I stood there shocked for a second, then said, "Could you put that away? That is so disrespectful." To which he replied "sorry" under his breath then proceeded to sit there like a wounded animal for the rest of the class, because obviously I had wronged him so.

Of course, the class wouldn't participate after that. I'm the villain, right. I'm out of line.

I can't give an accurate estimate on how many students text-messaged throughout the entire class period. Even when I told them to stop.

Several students came in more than 15 minutes late...one without so much as a backpack or the assignment to turn in. She told me after class that she'd just email it and that would be fine.

I don't know if the regular TA puts up with this bullshit, but that's exactly what it is, bullshit. I would NEVER even DESIRE to behave that way. These people are unbelievable.

And I really, really want to shake them until their heads roll away.

overcoming space and time

Haha. The two extremely tall gentlemen at our space/place "meeting" tonight conspicuously positioned in similar fashion.





I am done teaching for the semester. Had my last classes this morning. They went well; I am very sad. I doubt I'll have another semester like this one. And I really miss them already. Silly, I know. Not one will miss me. I don't think they know the effect that they had. They really got me through a lot of downers this semester.

Sorry for all of the personal droning as of late. I'm very emotional and I don't know why. Probably because I don't hate Boulder after all, have become accustomed to it, will miss my friends from here this summer, and am terribly stressed about all of the last minute to-dos.

The aforementioned "meeting" where that photo was taken seemed to drag on forever tonight. But, the topics are interesting. They better be--it's the focus of my directed study for this summer. Questions of space and place and time and materiality. What constitutes design? Is there such a thing as authenticity (yes) and what does that look like? What do capitalism, globalization, and commodification mean for studies in the rhetoric of space and time? Any thoughts? Lefebvre, Arendt, de Certeau, and Baudrillard had a few, but I'm so done with that.
Yes, yes. Spring is lovely. Oh, for the record, IT SNOWED TODAY. Damn you, Colorado. Happy May 1st.

surrender

I think that there comes a time when people need to reevaluate. Personally, professionally, spiritually, romantically...

I don't know where I am going or what I am doing. I will say this: I feel old already. I went to a student's show over the weekend. It was a student-written and produced spoof, part of a weekend-long festival with more of the same. Admittedly, I felt more than old; I also longed for a tight-knit group of friends like those on the stage and in the theater around me. I truly don't feel that I have belonged to a group like that since high school, and for a moment, I deeply regretted my decision to leave NYU 5 years ago. But, beyond that, I realized how little time there is left for experiences like the one I was witnessing. And I appreciated this realization very much, because it made me greatly appreciate the opportunity I have to be in graduate school. It may only be tangentially related to those lovely youthful experiences I am yearning for...but it's a step closer than the working world of insurance, mortgages, and responsibility.

I didn't get my students' papers ready for tomorrow, and I feel very guilty for this. I feel a lot of everything tonight. I don't know what brought on this longing/appreciation--a bittersweetness I can't define. I, as always, am terrified of the rate at which time passes and I guess I feel defeated, but joyous for what I have been given in said passing time.

ridin' the tiger

Lectured again today. This experience has actually been quite lovely. I would totally do that for a living. Too bad you need the PhD and research appointment to do it.







I have this student; we'll call him Kevin. Kevin gives me hope. They had a paper due last week. Their big final paper. And they had to find sources for it. Only 2. Well, Kevin emailed me to ask if it was ok if he had more. He had 11. 11 sources. His paper is totally kick ass. He is extremely bright and takes his education seriously. What a novel idea.
Kevin emailed Dr. D (our lecturing professor) with concerns/comments about the content of a particular lecture. Dr. D articulated a pretty kick ass response, and, instead of doing what most students would have done (hell, even what I would have done), Kevin wrote back saying. Wow, that's one heck of a response. You really changed my mind about stuff.
How mature.

Yeah, Kevin gives me hope. Maybe his alias should be Obama instead.

Haiku

Tea and milk

Thin. Inferior?

Source of life, robust and thick

Rich combination

I had my students play a public speaking game today that I lifted from Ian Reyes. They had three options regarding what they could prepare to say: 3 haikus, the soundtrack to their lives, or a life's to do list (those ideas, however, I will take credit for). Most chose the to do list, and it was interesting to hear what 18-20 year-olds in the university want from life. Most of them wanted to get married and have a family. "Traveling the world" was another popular one as most "had never even left the country." And, I heard a lot of shout outs to Semester at Sea as well.

I was fairly proud of this assignment. I think that reflection and thinking of one's self in such a way is largely neglected. What is your creative expression in 5-7-5 form? What 10-12 songs reflect the times and experiences now understood as 'you'? What are the hopes and dreams that keep you waking up each day? Share them. I'd adore it.

As far as my picture today, so not feeling it.

Even the longest journey begins with a single step

Photo commentary:
Sun damage, courtesy of Colorado, has already become apparent to me. Look to the lower right hand corner to find evidence of me letting my apartment go--the condition of my desk is atrocious.

Incriminating reflection:
While waiting for the bus today, reminders of last weekend's "undergraduate escapades" were unearthed in the bottom of my purse. Tonight Amanda and I are headed out on the town again, this time in Boulder, not Denver. I imagine that, as long as I steer clear of any strikingly gorgeous and notably cocky imports from the UK, I will not find myself in similar (and dire) circumstances.

Personal Drama:
There is an ongoing drama of a love that dare not speak its name. May 7th will bring a certain amount of freedom to this blog regarding said drama, but until then I can do little more than post random, cryptic asides. There are a select few people (Julie, Sam, Ethan, Maisha, Amanda) who are "in the know." This may prove to be a promising storyline in the future, perhaps the focus of the blog for at least a time. Of interest (and related): Baudrillard translated plays.

In the News:
Let's just reflect on this for a moment:
http://www.cnn.com/video/#/video/us/2008/04/11/williams.la.man.in.skirt.wafb

Tomorrow's Teaser:
I will begin to post scenes from a screenplay I have penned. It's a non-linear, artsy-fartsy piece of film festival bs that will keep you guessing. Hopes of production beginning this summer are in the forefront of my mind.*

*If you have access to a camera of a certain professional standard and will be in the Pittsburgh/northern panhandle WV area this summer, contact me. Even if you have absolutely zero interest in involvement with the project, we could arrange a certain price for use of previously stated equipment.